“But as for me, my feet had almost slipped;
I had nearly lost my foothold.”
Over the weekend I had asked my daughter if she wanted to spend time with me while I was in town. She made excuses as to why she couldn’t see me. Our relationship is strained because of the hurts from a divided family. My recent acts of affection for her fell to deaf ears and when she denied the time with me I felt insignificant, rejected. Yes, she is an adult and has her own life but that didn’t stop how I felt. I was tempted to drink again. I am 2 months from being 2 years sober. satan likes to attack when there are milestones or turning from him and towards Jesus. satan was filling my head with low self talk lies. I fought back and didn’t drink. I also wrote this poem declaring truth.
Safe in My Shadow
Where you are trouble you will see
But stay in My shadow, you will be safe with Me.
In your weakness the evil one will act
But stay safe in My shadow
My strength will keep our relationship in tact.
The evil one surrounds you day and night, do you hear?
You will be safe in My shadow
he cannot come near.
Wear My armor and hold Me tight
Stay in My shadow and watch his flight.
Insignificant, reject, lonely, dirty he will say
Stay safe in My shadow and keep him at bay.
A prisoner you are not
Stay safe in My shadow
he has no shot.
Out of the darkness, you I have led
Into the fire he goes with a crushed head.
Safe in My shadow, eyes on Me
Your spirit don’t let him scar.
Loved, worthy, my daughter, forgiven, righteous I say you are.
“Have mercy on me, my God, have mercy on me, for in you I take refuge. I will take refuge in the shadow of your wings until the disaster has passed.”
“Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High
Will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.”
I realized I had to go through this so Jesus can show me how much I rely on His strength instead of the old me. Relying on my own strength always got me in trouble. Looking back to the last time I let my relationship with my daughter bother me I fell. I see how far I have come. It is no surprise I am feeling this way coming up on my anniversary. My despair over her is what caused me to stumble. But that stumble was a blessing because Jesus rescued me and made me apart of His kingdom. His strength is what kept me from falling this time. I couldn’t have done it without Him. He also promised me twice that the relationship will one day be restored. All things work for good for those who are in Christ Jesus.